State of Being

Over the last year or so, I have been constantly running, or else trapped in a web of guilt for not running.Yesterday, I stopped running. 

I stopped feeling guilty for not running. 

I “unplugged”.

I spent the better part of most of the day outdoors, in mild exercise, and my soul finally had a moment in which to realize it was parched.

We live in a constant motion society. We are stressed because we can’t stop “doing”. And if we’re not “doing”, then the heaping amount of guilt we place on ourselves stresses us out further. 

When did I start believing that motion equaled value? That perfection was the same as happiness?

When was the last time I took some time and space to just be?

I know I am not alone in this. Scores of women (and men) feel like they are constantly busy but never seeming to get anything done. 

What ends the vicious cycle? We all have the same amount of time in a day. That never changes. We all have jobs. We have dishes that need to be washed, laundry to do, homes to clean. We each have relationships to maintain. The list can go on forever if we let it.

My question is this: is the life I want to create for myself a priority? Or do I want to allow myself to become a victim of time and circumstance?

I sat outside today and began reading Shauna Niequist’s book Present Over Perfect….for only the fifth time since it was released (last year). I’ve never made it very far into the book (due to a constant state of motion). But it is exactly what I need at this time. Like Shauna, I am on a quest to “leave behind frantic for a simpler, more soulful way of living”.

Because we only have this one life. And I don’t want to waste it on barely living. 

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