This is where it all begins.
Newness. Hope. Peace.
At the water’s edge.
That is where God has always met me. I am in awe of the power, majesty, and beauty–the breathtaking beauty–of water. It reminds me of who God is. Amazing. Awe-inspiring. Majestic. Untamed. Unpredictable. Wholly fearsome, and yet, at times utterly calm.
This weekend I ran away. Or I ran after. I’m not really sure which it was.
I was running away from something that I completely feared, yet desperately wanted. I was scared of what I was feeling, what might happen, what might not happen. And yet I hoped so completely. And what I realized, this weekend at the water’s edge, was that it is not something to run away from. It’s not something to run after.
It’s just something.
Something that I had to give over completely to God. I surrender all. All I am, all I hope. At His feet, I lay it down, and I leave it at the cross. No matter what may or may not happen in the future, Jesus is my all. He’s all I need. He is all that I want to want.
And I’m still working on that. Far too often, I want what I want, and it isn’t Him. Whether that’s a dessert, more coffee, an individual, a friendship that doesn’t fulfill, a relationship that I don’t have, a community that I haven’t found, a house that doesn’t fit into the budget, a talent that someone else possesses; I am too often focused on me. Instead I want to wholly depend on Him. To wholly trust in Jesus’ name. And to want Him above all else.
So this weekend, as I ran away, God knew the struggle I was facing. As it happens, somehow, I managed to run straight into His arms. It wasn’t where I thought I was going. But I do think it was exactly where I knew I really needed to be. Subconsciously, maybe; but part of me knew that.
I think part of me knew that I was running to the water’s edge after God.
And just as He always does….God met me there.
And so today as I drove away from the water’s edge, my heart cried out; my spirit yearned, tears fell. And an agonized cry sprung from my lips: Yes Lord. Yes. I choose You.